A spoiled child who gets coal for Christmas hires a hitman
to kill Santa Claus, who has grown bitter and angry. ACTION/FANTASY
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Fatman (2020)Written and Directed by Eshom Nelms and Ian Nelms
Starring Mel Gibson, Walton Goggins, Marianne Jean-Baptiste, Chance Hurstfield, Robert Bockstael, Eric Woolfe |
Fatman has what may just be the most insane premise I've ever heard of. A bitter, disgruntled Santa Claus who has to fend off a hitman because some asshole rich kid got coal for Christmas. It sounds like a Robot Chicken sketch or something. But no, this is a real movie starring Oscar winner Mel Gibson as Chris Cringle, the man who would be Santa Claus. And for some reason, that just works. Gibson plays Chris with a chip on his shoulder, as a man who thinks the world owes him some goddamn Christmas spirit for a change. My only gripe with the film is that it never goes quite as far as it could. The premise is already super strange. Why not double down and get freaky with it?
Spoiled rich brat Billy Wenan (Hurstfield) gets a box of coal for Christmas. Upset and pissed, he hires hitman Jonathan Miller (Goggins) to hunt down and kill Santa himself. Meanwhile, Santa Claus, or Chris as we know him, is on the verge of losing his federal contract. See, Christmas brings in $3 trillion in annual revenue in the U.S., so the government brought in Santa to take advantage of his free labor elf army and fast delivery system. Already, that's hilarious and mind-boggling to me. But since kids are such assholes these days, Chris's paycheck isn't cutting it, since he gets paid by the present. The lack of income forces Chris to take a military contract, which isn't really explored that much since Miller shows up and kills almost everyone. The battle between Chris and Miller is what we were waiting for, and while it's not bad, it does leave some unanswered questions. Fatman is destined to be a cult classic we all pull down off the shelf in December. The performances are pretty good, and I love the implications of this odd world where everyone knows Santa exists but some people just don't care. I think the film could've gone farther, maybe gone a little crazier. I think the Nelms Brothers played it fairly safe, and the film loses some luster because of it. Still, it's far better than I expected. |